Life can be very hard at times. One way it’s hard is that we often are faced with making decisions that will have an effect, not only on ourselves, but on others and perhaps the futures of many. In my essay on leadership, I argue that no decision properly constructed is a bad decision. It isn’t the result that defines a good decision, it’s the process–the care and attention to detail and as many elements as possible, that really count.
This is not to say that a person that makes “good” decisions with bad results all the time or even a lot of the time, can still be a great leader. I would argue quite against it. What I mean though is that what makes a good decision, especially in our day-to-day living, is one made in the cool cool cool of our minds while our emotions and biases have been left on the doorstep. If we make a “good” decision and yet things turn out badly, and they sometimes will, we may shake our heads and want to analyze how we might have done a better job; but, we won’t languish in guilt or regret.
Of course there are some of us that will languish in guilt and regret for eating an Oreo! But the average, psychologically hardy, rational person will look back and accept that things don’t always go as planned or desired, but they did the right thing. Regret, in my view, is born of not thinking things through, not denying your emotions, not critically evaluating what decision you are making and why. A little tactic I’ve used is to run my decision by someone else and ask them to talk me out of it. Hearing the other side of it is a good way to be as certain as you can be that you have considered all as you might. And when you’re done, you can at least ameliorate a loss with the knowledge that you’ve done the best you could.
Use the following if you wish, and send it as a reminder to those you care about:
May the sun stroke your face
The winds caress your arms
And the rains kiss your cheek…
And may you forever bask in the light of knowing
What you’ve done is the right thing.
~2013© Phil D’Agostino, The E-Motivator, ManageBeyondTheOrdinary.Com~
Until next time,
Have a truly positive day.